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‘hey, asshole!’: special ‘america’s greatest fans’ edition.

19 October 2006 | maura dot com | 4 Comments

normally, i don’t have a problem with people who are fans of out-of-town teams. however, tonight at d.b.a. there was an i-banker jerkface cardinals fan who caused me to pull the shea stadium ‘asshole’ chant out. not only was he running around like a moron every time a st. louis batter reached a 3-2 count, he:

1) spent about 20 minutes trying to (incorrectly!) explain the term ‘donkey punch’ to his unimpressed pals and a very cute boston terrier;

2) taunted said boston terrier with his pizza, waving the box in front of the dog’s face before chowing down;

3) made fun of a praying-to-the-heavens mets fan by saying about him, ‘your dad left your mom and she only makes $40,000 a year, and you think god cares about you?’

who wants to bet that this guy aspires to be a code.tv host? anyway, dude: this taurine-spiked vitamin water that i just drank by accident is for you. have fun watching your team get swept!

4 Comments

  1. richard said on 20 Oct 2006 at 0.41:

    I am very much looking forward to another display of Tony LaRussa’s World Series futility.

  2. richard said on 20 Oct 2006 at 0.51:

    Oh,and from Jack Marshall on SoSH: “Wait…let me get this straight. There’s a subway that runs between St. Louis and Detroit???”

  3. nick s said on 20 Oct 2006 at 2.31:

    Two sweeps in three years for the Cards? That’s about right.

    Also: that British woman on code.tv? So not fucking posh, it’s hilarious.

  4. Reid said on 20 Oct 2006 at 20.37:

    It depresses me that out-of-town yuppie baseball fans even know how to FIND d.b.a. *sigh* Another great beer bar ruined.

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